Sometimes love is an obligation to your grandmother

Sometimes love is an obligation to your grandmother - RelenaFanel “Valentine’s Day just isn’t a good day for you,” the guy said, looking at Derek more intently. “You’re really bad at this date thing, even when the date is your own hand.”

The tone for this short Sterek AU where Derek has his grandmother as his wingman. Thankfully she didn't go on the dates with him. She was more of a dating coach who was pretty hip. I was not gaga about it.

A snippet of his grandmother: "Three attractive people like you probably won’t even have to buy your own drinks. Don’t stand together like a herd. Branch out. Give some guy bedroom eyes. Don’t forget to use condoms and enjoy all the cock you’ll be getting! I’ve included lube."

Literally, I can't. I'm gagging. And not the good kind either.
Moving on from the hip grandma...

Derek has no game. And that shit made me LOL.

“Do you like muffins?” he asked in a brusque tone, because honestly, he didn’t really care whether she did or not. He just wanted to fulfill his grandmother’s stupid list and take a nap.
“Uh… sure…?”
“Here,” Derek answered, dropping the bag on the table in front of her and moving towards the door without a backwards glance.

“Wow,” the teenage boy who’d been in line behind him was now staring at him with a cup of coffee in his hand. “That dude has less game than I do,” he said to his friend.

For real. Wow. @_@

I know he wouldn't even have to try. Just stand there, Derek. Even with that porn star moustache you're rocking lately...if you surl, they will cum.

Best line: “Well, speaking of cock,” Rick said, looking at Derek. “Mine just so happens to be great. I haven’t gotten any complaints.”

“No complaints doesn’t mean it’s great,” Laura jeered, jarring him with his shoulder. “Hardly the same thing at all. Unless someone has said ‘wow Rick, your dick is great’ then it’s probably just ok.”

“Mine’s ok,” Rick said to Derek. “So what do you say? You’re single. I’m single.”

This was funny and cute, a little corny but adorbz all the same. It has that rom-com feel. 3.5 stars but I'll round up.

P.S. No sex in this one but I didn't miss it